The Road So Far

When I was 10 years old and in the 5th grade, I weighed in at 188 pounds. I was always an active child -- I played softball for 12 years, basketball for 8, tennis for 7, and marching band for 4. My doctors recommended a food diary to try and pinpoint areas for improvement. My parents documented everything that I ate and drank for about 3 months. 
5th Grade -- camping with the family
At our check-in, I weighed in at 196. I had gained 8 pounds in only 3 months. My doctors asked me to tweak a few things -- more vegetables, less fruit... more white meat, less red. More milk and water, less juice. But other than that, they were very pleased with my eating habits, but still concerned about the weight gain.

They sent me for rounds of testing, originally concerned with my thyroid, but nothing showed up.

8th grade banquet
I was sent to specialists at Yale and found myself in and out of doctors' offices and exam rooms over the next 7 years. No one seemed to be able to find an answer. Finally, shortly before my 18th birthday, I sat in an office with yet another new doctor. He began by asking me questions that no one had really asked me before. He began to look at the back of my neck and under my arms. At the time, I had no idea what he was looking for. He explained to my mother and I that he had a gut feeling about something, but needed some testing to confirm. I begged for no more blood tests, but he promised that he would only complete testing that was absolutely necessary. He also promised that if he was correct, the testing could stop.

Dave's Prom in 2004
Finally, in July 2006, it was confirmed. I suffered from Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). At the time, my head was spinning. Even at only 18, I was worried about so many things about the future. First and foremost, I asked if I would be able to lose weight now that we had a diagnosis. My doctors explained that it would be very hard and take a lot of extra time and effort, but he would support me. My next question -- will I be able to have children some day?

The answer here was a bit more complicated than my 18-year-old mind could process. They explained that it is absolutely possible. They said that many women with PCOS have children. They also said that chances are... I will require outside influences and will not be able to conceive on my own.

They started me on a series of birth control pills to help me to regulate my cycles. He said that it was a step necessary to weight loss.

I left for college and followed every step that they laid in front of me. I took the prescriptions, exercised daily, ate what the told me to eat, and stayed far away from alcohol. By the end of my freshman year, I weight 230lbs. At the end of my sophomore year, 247, and by the time I graduated college, I weighed 272 lbs. I pleaded with my doctor to change something up, but he insisted that I stay the course. When I weighed in at 287 lbs, I parted ways with my doctor and looked for someone new. 

It was so difficult to find someone to help me! Many of the doctors I contacted questioned why I left a perfectly reputable doctor and said they had full case loads and couldn't take on an additional patient. I had all but given up.

My now-husband and I began to plan our wedding, I started my first year of teaching...
October 7th, 2012 -- Best day of my life

I went to the gym daily and in a year, I lost 12 lbs. Between 2011 and 2014, I have gained and lost weight more times than I can count. I have fluctuated between 266 and 308 lbs.

Foxwoods Casino with my husband
This spring,  I decided that I am ready for a change. My husband and I are happily in love and I want to be able to to be around for him for as long as possible. I fear that my weight is holding me back from that. I spoke with my doctor and he has tweaked my prescriptions -- adding Metformin to the mix, as well as a series of supplements. Hopefully, this is it... the push that I need. I have always wanted to look and feel better about myself, but I'm not sure that I have ever committed myself so seriously to it. 

So, here I am... working to hold myself extra accountable. This journey is a difficult one and I am terrified of falling short once again.  I will do my best to document my weight loss journey here. Please feel free to share any recommendations that you may have. My heart is full of love to give and I do not want to disappoint my husband by not doing this.

So, here goes... wish me luck!


November 16th, 2014: 306
November 23rd, 2014: 303.4
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